Sallie passed away in late August. It was very hard to believe or process. Last year, I wrote her an email and I am very glad that I did. We had no idea that we wouldn't be able to share Thanksgiving messages this year. Life is very transient yet the soul is immortal and free from all kinds of worldly concerns, a good enough consolation.
Sallie, I miss you a lot! I ask myself often: What would she tell me/write about this or that question? I'll take refugee in our over 2K email exchanges. I already did several times. They can make a good book, perhaps they should. But who is going to support it this time? 😔
---
29 Nov.2024
Dear Sallie,
Who else if not you that I'm gladly reaching out on this special day called Thanksgiving? I give my thanks to the Ultimate Divine Power for crossing paths with you 10 years ago. Our connection was on the spot, immediate. You invited me to have lunch and a conversation. My journal says: 21- November 2014, Teahouse on Canyon Road, Santa Fe.
Since then, you've changed my life, eased my mind and my heart more than once, I can never express those feelings in any worldly language.
(...) But for the rest of my deeply challenged life's fronts -especially the past 3 years-, you didn't let me feel like a failure, not even in the hardest times. You always encouraged me to get up, stand up, and keep on walking, praying, creating, and passing it forward to the other women in need. Plus, I can never underestimate the power of your publications in my personal life, I've read many of them in the last 10 years, beginning with The Blue Box.
I'm flying to Istanbul very soon (December 3rd) and my time in California has been healing for the first 1-1,5 months, and then I moved on, enjoying the simple pleasures of daily life. 2 weeks ago, I reached out to the director of Religious Studies at University of California-Riverside Campus whose background is unusual: Women, Gender, and Sexuality Studies AND Religious Studies Scholar! She responded to my email very positively and I am very likely to get a visiting scholar's status at UCR beginning in mid-January. I've not been there before but it is part of the state-funded University of California system and ranks very high in the U.S.
An unpaid position but will give me the office space, the community that I've missed a lot this past year. A place to breathe in. I'm in the process of reaching out, learning and meeting new like-minded women ONCE again. The thick dark cloud -the result of months of caretaking in Istanbul- has turned into a light gray tone now. Maybe soon, it might even get colorful again. I'm working on myself and the financial stress (a big one indeed!) was not there THANKS to you during this visit to the US. This is what I mean by "you've truly changed my life, Sallie," it's nothing less...
It's hard to separate one's essential self from the other worldly/ego-self. But I know that you know what I mean. I'm ever grateful to your online blog entries that are about spirituality-hope-empowerment nexus. I saved some of them and went back to them when I felt down (still do). Same with some of your emails to me, much more efficient than any therapist can offer.
Happy Thanksgiving!
With love,
Ozlem
Hiç yorum yok:
Yorum Gönder